Funko Pops: What's Hot, What's Not, and Why I'm Already Over It

Title: Alien: Earth's Eye-Staring Sheep Gets a Funko POP! Because We Haven't Suffered Enough

Okay, so the breakout star of Alien: Earth is a sheep with a freakin' eyeball? Seriously? Give me a break. I watched that show, or at least, I tried to watch that show. It was like wading through a swamp of pretentious dialogue and dimly lit scenes. And now, THIS is what they decide to immortalize in plastic? A damn sheep.

The Horror, The Horror...Of Marketing

Funko, bless their soulless corporate hearts, have decided that what the world really needs is a vinyl figurine of this…thing. "Sheep with the Eye," they're calling it. Sounds like a rejected title from a B-movie horror flick.

Here's the official description: "An extraterrestrial threat is scoping out your FX’s Alien: Earth collection! Experiment with a new discovery when you make POP! Sheep with the Eye the next addition to your POP! Television lineup."

Experiment with a new discovery? What is this, a science fair project? They're talking about a goddamn sheep possessed by an alien parasite! And "scoping out your collection"? It's a piece of plastic, people. It's not gonna judge your interior decorating choices.

They're really pushing the "authentication packaging," too, with "micro-optic technology that cannot be duplicated or replicated." Like anyone's gonna bootleg a Sheep with the Eye Funko POP!. I mean, come on. Who are they kidding?

A New Low in Pop Culture? Maybe.

This whole thing just feels…lazy. Like they ran out of actual ideas for Alien merchandise and just grabbed whatever vaguely unsettling thing they could find. It's the equivalent of making a Funko POP! of the chestburster's lunch.

And let's be real, Funko is already drowning us in these things. Alien Funko Pops, Stranger Things Funko Pops, Batman funko pop... you can't walk into a Gamestop or Hot Topic without being bombarded by those dead-eyed plastic stares. Are we really that desperate for more consumer crap? I mean, I get it, people like collecting stuff, but this feels like a new level of absurdity.

But wait, I can pre-order this…thing…for $14.99? Offcourse I can. Because nothing says "I have disposable income and questionable taste" like a pre-ordered, web-exclusive Funko POP! of a demonic sheep.

I guess what really bothers me is the sheer cynicism of it all. They're preying on our nostalgia, our desire for…something. But what exactly are we getting? A cheap thrill? A momentary distraction from the crushing weight of existence?

Maybe I'm just getting old and cranky. Maybe this is the future of entertainment. Maybe I should just go back to yelling at clouds.

But Is It Art? Or Just…Stuff?

They say Funko is good at making anything adorable. But even this…thing…gives me the willies.

Is that the point? To take something inherently creepy and turn it into a cutesy collectible? To sanitize horror for mass consumption? I honestly don't know anymore.

We've Officially Hit Peak Absurdity

The creepy sheep from Alien: Earth is getting a Funko POP! and The Creepy Sheep From ALIEN: EARTH Has a Gnarly Funko POP!, according to Nerdist.